regain your hymen–or, honey, get the alum!

the link works, but the image won't load. Sorry :(

The directions say to apply a few drops to the desired area 15 minutes prior to any activity for desired results and moisturization.

Yes, ladies, add these to your hoo-hoo before you do household chores so you don’t get that droopy feeling and find at the end of the day that, yes, the laundry’s done, but your vagina’s fallen out.

One customer wrote: “This made me so tight, but dry. Why would this be pleasurable for women? It was as painful as the first time. Don’t buy this.” RN – October 1, 2008

Side note:  if you go looking to re-instate your virginity, you should be prepared for some discomfort.
Should you discover that your vagina has indeed fallen out, guess what. You can send those vaginal muscles to the gym with its own set of weights.



And it comes with an instructional video!  I wonder if it gives step-by-step instructions.

3 Commentsto regain your hymen–or, honey, get the alum!

  1. laurencummings says:


  2. MATTHEW ROSE says:

    Wonderfully irreverent! Maybe you can submit a work to our project A BOOK ABOUT DEATH



    P.S. Found you on linkedin.

  3. vyxen says:

    That is fantastic. Wow.

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